<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Connection by imaginaryfriendashkun</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27913327">Connection</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun'>imaginaryfriendashkun</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AU, Abuse is wrong!, Angst, Blood, Domestic Violence, Emotions, Feelings, Gore, Human and Android Interface, Hurt/Comfort, LGBT, M/M, Misunderstandings, Nightmare, Past Abuse, Soulmates, Violence, connection, emotional bond, fight, interface, slow build relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:14:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,429</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27913327</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Apparently, androids are not the only ones who can interface with each other. Even humans and androids can. Something is happening between Nines and Gavin and they don't even realize because they are being stubborn, oblivious soulmates in love.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Upgraded Connor | RK900/Gavin Reed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>DISCLAIMER: All rights reserved. No part of these pages, either text or image may be used for any purpose other than personal use. Reproduction, modification, storage in a retrieval system or retransmission, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical or otherwise, for reasons other than personal use, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission. </p><p>All mistakes - plot, grammar, characterization, situation descriptions - are mine. Not beta'd. Let me know if there are glaring problems, I want to improve :) </p><p>#DetroitEvolution</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>
  <em>"Dad, don't hurt mom!"</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>His dad sneers, "Why, are you going to be her fucking knight in shining armor? Are you going to protect her? You are so small, you are thirteen, yet so small, where are your muscles? Where is your height? Will you <strong>ever</strong> reach puberty? Look at you. Disgusting. Gay twink."</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>His dad slaps his mom again.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Gavin blinks back tears as he jumps in front of his mom. His dad stinks. His dad is drunk. Very drunk. And his dad is very violent when he is drunk. Not like he normally isn't. It worsens when he is drunk and that is not saying much. His dad hates him. His dad hates his mom. His dad hates everyone and everything. He is not happy that Gavin is gay. Hell, he won't be happy even if Gavin were <strong>not</strong> gay. He always has some reason or the other to put him and his mom down.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He will find something else to be unhappy with Gavin. Gavin isn't into sports. Gavin isn't a jock. Gavin isn't good enough at studies. Gavin isn't into trekking. Some crappy reason. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>His dad tries to reach for his mom but Gavin side steps, making his dad angry on purpose so he can concentrate on Gavin instead of his mom. He ignores his mom's whispers of Gavin to leave, he ignores her begging his dad to not beat Gavin. He takes the slaps and the punches and the kicks. His dad pushes away his mom as she tries to stop him, as she tries to come in between Gavin and him. His dad is huge, super strong, even more strong while drunk.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>His dad won't ever be happy with him and his mom. Why does his mom take it? Why not just leave? Why not complain to the police? She doesn't let Gavin do that either. Why does he listen to his mom? He shouldn't. One day. One day. He is going to bring in the cops and get his father taken away. Then. Then. His mom and he will be happy. <strong>Right?</strong></em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He just hopes that he won't be too late.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>Gavin knows it is a nightmare. That this isn't real. That his father isn't alive. Neither is his mother. That his father can't hurt him anymore. That there are no kicks or punches or violence. His mom isn't begging for real. He knows. </p><p> </p><p>He is thirty five for fuck's sake. It has been nearly twenty years. He knows, yet he can't do anything about the fear, about the panic, the anxiety, the helplessness, the pain, the guilt. He is frozen. He can't breathe. He can't. <em>Fuck.</em> He can't. He can't wake up. </p><p> </p><p>Why isn't Nines by his side? Why isn't Nines waking him up? Nines usually wakes him up - even that takes sometime but Nines is always slow and patient, just his presence helps a lot - because Gavin can't wake up on his own unless there is an external factor when he has something like this, in between a night terror and sleep paralysis. </p><p> </p><p>Is something wrong with Nines? Shit. Shit. They share the bed and Nines' statis isn't very deep. Neither is Gavin's sleep. They are light sleepers and wake up easily when they hear sounds, even the lightest ones.</p><p> </p><p>And Gavin is sure he is making fucking inhuman noises. His heart beat spikes even more because of the thought that Nines isn't probably well.</p><p> </p><p>He waits agonizingly for a few minutes and he realizes that he can finally fucking move. That his body is finally willing to listen to him. He wakes up and at the same time, he sees Nines shoot up and sit ramrod straight on the bed.</p><p> </p><p>Both of them breathlessly whisper each other's name with a slight stutter.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"N-Nines?"</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"G-Gavin?"</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Nines shuffles closer after checking if Gavin is OK with touch. He relaxes onto Gavin's chest. Gavin is fine. Gavin is fine. His human is OK. Just a nightmare. Gavin isn't dead. Gavin is alive and well, exhausted but still alive and kicking. And short tempered and foul mouthed as usual.</p><p> </p><p>But... why couldn't he wake himself from the statis? There are no errors or warning or instabilities. He scans his systems. He seems to be under a little bit of pressure but there is no root cause. This is extremely weird and concerning. He usually wakes up immediately as soon as he hears Gavin's soft voice but what happened today? Is it because he himself was dreaming as well?</p><p> </p><p>A dream, if one chooses to call it that. Androids technically don't have dreams but deviancy has opened up all sorts of portals for androids. What Nines saw wasn't completely just a memory either. He has feelings and emotions and a different perspective now, attached to his memories, new and old, it is not just a simple replay of memories.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>There is blood, lots of blood pooling on the floor. Lots of it. Red from humans. Blue from androids. Mixing morbidly. He stabbed a few. Threw knives at a few. Strangled a few. Shot a few. Broke a few. Ripped apart a few. All of them were on the list to be terminated, to be killed. Not to be subdued, not to be arrested, not to be stopped but to be <strong>killed,</strong> on sight.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>CyberLife programmed him. His instructions are crystal clear. And he has to follow it all, no matter what. After all, they are leading in the industry when it comes to AI and androids.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Blood bath. That is what he is standing in. He created this. He let this happen. He looks around and scans, making sure that there is no sign of life. Of course, he doesn't have to because he is very precise with even the first aim. He never misses. No one can hide or run from him.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He makes an amazing picture, arms, legs, clothes painted in blood, eyes glowing in the eeriness of the night. Flickering between red and blue. LED stuck at a maroon red.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He marches on, taking in all the lifeless eyes, unmoving bodies, scattered body parts. One face stands out. A face with dark curly hair, black eyes and deep dark circles. Short but muscled body covered in a jacket. A face that shouldn't be here in this timeline, in this memory.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em><strong>Oh...</strong> that's when he realizes that he should be in statis. And usually memories don't replay themselves when he is in statis unless he reaches out for them. And this isn't just a memory. The ending is different. Based on his recent fears, emotions.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>And he feels guilt and fear and disgust wrap around him. He never went through these memories for a reason. He never replayed them after going to DPD. He avoided them. He couldn't tell why but he didn't want to be associated with them and now he knows why. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>They bring out so many negative emotions in him and he feels his chest constrict even though he technically doesn't have to breathe. He feels suppressed, he wants to get away, he doesn't want to face this, he killed so many - forced to, but still - innocent people mercilessly. God.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>And that face lying there, amidst the chaos he created, pale, accusing eyes... drives home more fear and guilt and panic. Because that is a face that shouldn't be here, in this memory. A face that doesn't belong in this time. A face he would meet only in the future, after becoming a deviant, at the DPD. Why is that face here, now? Why is Nines the cause of this human's death? Of <strong>his</strong> own human's death?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Because hurting this human is something Nines doesn't want, never wanted and never will.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Something whirrs in him. This isn't just a memory. Most of it is, yes. But not that extra body. This is one of his simulated what-if scenarios. Nines has multiple thoughts every day. He analyzes every situation. He thinks of all kinds of possibilities. This is one of those. Just a few days back, Nines was glad that he didn't meet Gavin before the revolution.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Glad that they weren't on opposite sides, glad that Gavin didn't witness his barbaric side. Glad that Gavin wasn't on his list of people to be killed.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Gavin probably knows, only few at the DPD know, it is supposed to be hidden, Nines' past before deviancy, for a valid reason. Only Fowler, Hank, Connor and Gavin know. Connor because he is Nines' predecessor - family, elder brother? - and is supposed to help Nines fit in better.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Fowler and Hank because they are his direct superiors. Gavin, because he is Nines' partner.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Is his mind conjuring up images and videos using his thoughts and words? But why?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The image blurs and Nines is somewhere else now. Nines can't even dwell on what this is. Dream? Nightmare? Glitch? Bug? Imagination? Hallucination? Panic attack? Side affects of going into statis after long time? Long work hours without breaks? He can't comprehend this. Usually when he is in statis, most of his systems won't work.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>It is so that they don't heat up because of continuous use, so they can be upgraded, serviced, taken care of, put to rest instead of being used all the time, that is not optimum. Machines need down time. So they can last longer. But he knows that is not the only reason he can't understand this. He knows that he will have difficulty in deciphering this even out of statis.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>How to scientifically explain android dreams? Well, androids can feel emotions because of deviancy and that can't be scientifically explained either. Deviancy has opened a lot of doors for androids apparently. And all of it is unfamiliar. It doesn't come with a manual. Can a manual on something bizarre as this even of help someone as complicated and advanced as Nines?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He is jerked out of his thoughts as he hears a shout.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The voice is familiar. It is his human. Nines can recognize it from anywhere, any distance, in any form, in any decibel - soft or harsh or underwater, whatever, wherever, whenever, however. His human is being shot at. During a case.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Oh. It is the memory of Gavin being shot a few weeks back. Nines wasn't fast enough. Thankfully, Gavin's left shoulder was just grazed, still... it was frankly too close to his heart and it took a lot out of Nines to calm himself down, to not hurt the perps during arrest more than necessary, to not use force. Gavin had to calm him down in the hospital. Nines lost it instead of taking care of Gavin properly. But he came around quickly to take care of the rest.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>But... this is different. The bullet doesn't just graze his human's shoulder. The bullet passes through him, right through his heart and he collapses in Nines' arms, bleeding. Nines lets the perps run, he doesn't care less about them. His white jacket is growing wet because of his human's blood. It is not stopping. It is <strong>not</strong> stopping no matter what Nines' does. If only Gavin were an android like Nines himself. Nines can't fix this.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The ambulance isn't fast enough. Nines keeps asking his human to stay with him but his human just smiles painfully, shakes his head and Nines is left to watch the light fade slowly, painfully from his eyes. No. No. Don't! </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Nines can't open his mouth to get the words out. It is as if he is the one who is shot and breathless and dying, not the human in his arms.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>If he thought the incident a few weeks back riled him, affected him, paralyzed him, that is nothing compared to what he is feeling right now. Nines feels as if his thirium pump is going to shut down, as if he is going to shut down along with his human, as if he is going into shock. As if he is self destructing. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He can't bring himself to come out of statis. He usually can do that. When he hears Gavin's whimpers during his nightmares. Now he can hear his human's pained moans and Gavin's struggles. This is not real but Nines can't get himself out.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>And suddenly all of it stops and he jolts up.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>Gavin cuts to the chase. "What the fuck, tin can, what was wrong?" What happened?</p><p> </p><p>Of course, Nines senses the worry and fear for Nines laced behind the direct, biting words. Gavin isn't accusing Nines for not waking him up. Gavin is just assuming that something is seriously wrong with Nines. He wants to know what happened.</p><p> </p><p>Is something wrong with Nines? His diagnosis doesn't come up with anything. His full system scan shows zero results. It is as if it never even happened, as if it is expected. Nines needs more data and he has a strange inkling that this will happen again. It is not based on gut feeling, it is based on prediction, based on historical data after he turned deviant.</p><p> </p><p>"Nines?" Gavin is waiting impatiently, tapping his legs.</p><p> </p><p>Nines shakes his head and replies honestly, "I... am not sure, Gavin. I- I think I dreamed - if you can even call it that - for the first time and that's why I couldn't wake up on time to wake you up. I am sorry."</p><p> </p><p>Gavin brushes off his apology with an exaggerated eyeroll. "Stupid toaster."</p><p> </p><p>Nines chuckles softly. Gavin is admonishing him for being worried about Gavin instead of worrying about Nines himself. This is their usual routine. They put the other before their own selves. Gavin does the same. He took care of Nines when Gavin was the one who was shot. What's new?</p><p> </p><p>Gavin opens his mouth but Nines replies before Gavin can even frame the sentence. "My scan shows I am fine."</p><p> </p><p>Gavin lets out a relieved sigh. "That's good." His vitals reach a normal and it's Nines turn to be relieved.</p><p> </p><p>He shifts into a more comfortable position, resting his back against the head rest and stretching out his arms and legs, careful not to jostle Nines who is leaning against Gavin's chest. Nines covers Gavin's legs with a blanket and moves to lie his head on Gavin's shoulder. Gavin entwines their fingers together and they try to drift off to sleep together even though they are wide awake because of what they just went through.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>They don't even realize that they felt something, someone else in their respective minds. Some other presence other than just their own emotions and nightmares and memories. Something else, some other lingering figure, familiar yet strange. Lost. New. <em>Uncertain.</em> </p><p> </p><p>They are too wound up, drained, confused to think of anything else, to relate, to put two and two together. That it wasn't just their own fear they were feeling. Not seeing the obvious, blatant overlap of emotions and influence of actions. The obvious connection to their waking up. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>DISCLAIMER: All rights reserved. No part of these pages, either text or image may be used for any purpose other than personal use. Reproduction, modification, storage in a retrieval system or retransmission, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical or otherwise, for reasons other than personal use, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission. </p><p>All mistakes - plot, grammar, characterization, situation descriptions - are mine. Not beta'd. Let me know if there are glaring problems, I want to improve :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>"Detective, I will take the left, you take the right and after finding and handing them to the back up that's on its way, we will meet here, at the warehouse again to make sure that everything and everyone is accounted for." Their final sweep after the operation comes to an end to make sure nothing is missed out and for a detailed report.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin starts running already as he hears the word 'right', adrenaline pumping though him. He doesn't want to let the criminal escape, he just throws a thumbs up sign haphazardly behind him, doesn't hear Nines' exasperated sigh or see his eye roll. They can contact each other later after the successful round up and meet. Nines will find him. He always does. </p><p> </p><p>Gavin, despite being a great detective, during the thrill of the chase and all that becomes pretty pathetic with directions <em>after.</em> Of course, thankfully Nines is there to help.</p><p> </p><p>In his hurry, he doesn't even realize that Nines, on purpose made him take the right where there is a single perp whereas, towards the left, there are two perps with weapons on them. He will realize that later and have a talk with Nines but now, he just runs, too fixated on the mission than anything else.</p><p> </p><p>Everything is over within a few seconds and Gavin watches as the perp is escorted away. He waves the officers away, forgetting to walk with them, staying back to check if he has missed anything out. His high comes down and he realizes that he doesn't know where he is. He smacks himself mentally and searches his coat for his phone. He realizes that he probably left it in the car where he and Nines were on the lookout. They came out in a hurry.</p><p> </p><p>Should he move around and get himself lost even more or just wait? GPS or not, phone or not, Nines should be able to find his way towards Gavin, right? After all, Nines has a mental map and he is good at guessing and tracing Gavin's and perps' movements easily and accurately. There should not be many combinations given that this is a small place. Nines will get to him soon. This place doesn't have CCTVs everywhere but there are a few of them littered here and there that Nines can access - not exactly legal but Nines knows what to do. </p><p> </p><p>Gavin can sit still only for a few minutes. He stands and paces up and down. Why is Nines late? Is he OK? Did something happen? Is Nines in a position and that's why he can't come to Gavin? Why the fuck did he have to leave his phone today out of all days? Why does Nines have to be late today of all days?</p><p> </p><p>He tries to backtrack his steps and his memories and Gavin hears a voice, Nines' voice in his head. 'Gavin, the warehouse.' And he can remember the route he took just like that. A flash. A map. Is Nines inhuman attention to detail rubbing off on him? Gavin is a detective and good with details but not as good as Nines, who of course, has a photographic memory, being the best android out there and all that.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin moves quickly. He ignores the feeling, that didn't feel like his imagination, that voice felt too real to be just in his head, to be just his imagination. Very clear. Loud. Very near. Crystal clear. It is not his earpiece. It is not working, it broke during the scuffle with the perp. Gavin shakes his head. He is just too worried and still high from the chase, nothing else.</p><p> </p><p>It is just that, they know each other well, so damn well that Gavin can hear - picture, imagine, this is not real - Nines fondly grumbling, scolding and complaining about Gavin's carelessness.</p><p> </p><p>And sure enough, Nines meets him half way. He is muttering to himself - just as Gavin pictured, nothing more, nothing less, he really should rest his hyperactive mind - and stops as he looks at Gavin and his eyebrows shoot up. "Gavin, you are <em>not</em> lost?"</p><p> </p><p>Gavin rolls his eyes and hits Nines' back. "Asshole, don't look so surprised. At least try, yea?"</p><p> </p><p>Nines shrugs. "You probably made it harder for me to find you by moving around. Why didn't you just stay put?"</p><p> </p><p>"Tin can, why were you late?" Gavin grumbles, ignoring Nines' teasing. He turns Nines, pats him all over and scrutinizes carefully and lets go only when he knows for sure that Nines isn't hurt anywhere. He can't scan Nines conveniently. He is pretty sure that Nines has already scanned him for injuries even though Gavin hates it. It is just a thing between them.</p><p> </p><p>"The back up was late. And when I tried to connect with you, I could hear only static from the ear piece. You probably broke it. It is the 16th one you have broken in the past 3 months, Fowler isn't going to be happy even though it is not that costly. Then I tried calling your phone, no answer, I realized that it is either dead or forgotten in our car like 20% of the times. I tried not to think of negative scenarios carefully and rushed, the probability of you getting hurt was only 10% this time given the situ-"</p><p> </p><p>Gavin chuckles as Nines rambles, his LED changes colors from yellow to red to yellow. It is nice to hear him ramble for a change. Nines is someone who doesn't like using a lot of words. This happens only when he is with Gavin or when he is worried. It is the same feeling Gavin had just a few moments ago when he realized that Nines was late.</p><p> </p><p>"Tin can, it is OK, I am OK, you are OK, breathe, calm down. We are fine."</p><p> </p><p>Nines stops abruptly and nods. He smiles softly and reminds Gavin, "I don't need to breathe, Detective."</p><p> </p><p>Gavin rolls his eyes - he holds back from flicking Nines off - and they walk to the warehouse - others would have already finished the sweep and it should be safe - fingers brushing, matching each others' steps easily, Nines' LED pulsing a soft blue.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>Nines taps softly on Gavin's shoulder. Didn't Nines just walk past the table Gavin and Hank are sitting at? Why did he come back? Nines usually doesn't do that unless he is unsure or hesitant about something. He is straight forward and blunt and to the point most of the times. And he is rarely unsure about something - unless that something involves emotions and humans and his deviancy.</p><p> </p><p>"Detective, did you call my name?"</p><p> </p><p>Gavin is a bit confused and worried at the same time. Nines has the best sensors out there. Is something wrong with Nines' systems? Temporary glitch or malfunction? Because, no, Gavin didn't even say Nines name out loud. He only thought about Nines because Hank was talking about Connor, they weren't even talking about Nines.</p><p> </p><p>Hank was saying about how Connor has progressed a lot with his deviancy. He sounded so proud and happy. Connor, of course, isn't a military android, he wasn't built to kill, unlike Nines. Deviancy is not easy for androids but comparatively, Connor has it a little better than Nines. Hank would kill Gavin if Gavin were to say that loud. Everyone faces difficulties in their life and what Gavin just thought of isn't fair to Connor but something in Gavin just wants to defend Nines inside his head.</p><p> </p><p>Connor's model has better social protocols than Nines'. Connor's behavior was better even before his deviancy, he adjusted to humans much better and faster than Nines. There is a reason why Nines was built completely different from Connor even though Connor is in the same model line and his predecessor.</p><p> </p><p>And that was what Gavin was thinking about. He knows it probably sounds unfair to Connor but he can't help it. He didn't even know that he was capable of thinking like this about Nines. Defending Nines in his mind even though Hank never told anything related to Nines. If he had, would Gavin have said it out loud? He strangely doesn't want to test that.</p><p> </p><p>He brushes it off and concentrates on Nines, masking his worry with his bad nicknames. "I didn't, tin can."</p><p> </p><p>Nines blinks, "Were you talking about me?"</p><p> </p><p>Gavin shakes his head again.</p><p> </p><p>"No, tin can."</p><p> </p><p>Hank shakes his head too and Nines can tell that they are not lying, they aren't pulling his leg. They are serious and the atmosphere grows awkward till Gavin breaks the silence, "Are you OK, metal head? Is something wrong? Do you... need help?"</p><p> </p><p>Nines doesn't know how to respond to that. Why did it feel so real? As if Gavin spoke his name out loud? And he felt that little pain and twinge and reaction to stop it - he usually feels these when he tries to let a new android interface with him. But there was something more. Something warm, caring, loving, fond, exasperated. Some kind of positive feeling - Defense? Hope? Love? Desire? Want? Protection? Adoration?</p><p> </p><p>Gavin slaps his hands in front of Nines, "Nines, Nines! Earth to Nines!" And this time, worry is pretty evident on his face and he is not using harsh nicknames.</p><p> </p><p>"No, Detective, I am fine, thank you."</p><p> </p><p>Nines walks away and thankfully Hank holds Gavin back from following him, sensing that Nines needs some time to himself. Nines LED keeps flickering between yellow and red constantly. </p><p> </p><p>There is a weird feeling inside Nines, he can't describe it, he puts it off  and stores it carefully so he can analyze later. A lot of such incidents have been happening recently. And there is still no diagnosis from his scans. And he has been strangely procrastinating as well. </p><p> </p><p>He wanted more incidents, more data so he can later analyze better but strangely even though there are lots of data available now, he is hesitant to proceed. <em>Why?</em> He doesn't have an answer for the first time. And this is not something related to deviancy, he can't ask Gavin or some other human or just look it up. This is strange, even for him.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>"You are burning a hole through me, tin can." Gavin teases.</p><p> </p><p>Nines snaps out of his head. It is not as if staring at Gavin is going to give him an answer magically. It seems like all the weird incidents that have been happening are related to Gavin somehow. It is so glaringly obvious and anyone could have gathered that, they don't have to be a super computer for that.</p><p> </p><p>And for someone who is the cause of his anomalies, looking at him also strangely... calms Nines down. Ironical. But that is how it is, simply.</p><p> </p><p>When he was starting at Gavin, he actually wasn't thinking or analyzing anything. It just felt good. Peaceful. It is never silent inside his mind. Never but just a few seconds back, it was. Even though the strange incidents have been weighing on him, the past few seconds gave him much needed quiet and relaxation. He didn't even know that he needed these things.</p><p> </p><p>Nines hates being idle, he needs to have something to do all the time, be it work or something else; preferably work because he is a workaholic. He keeps himself occupied doing multiple things - reading, painting, writing, skating, cooking, cleaning - he needs to be in a constant motion - physically or mentally. Of course, he doesn't get tired which is a good thing. He even doesn't like charging or sleeping - statis - much. But he finds that he doesn't mind being idle if he is alone with Gavin. And that goes against the fundamentals of his entire design, being. <em>Only</em> Gavin can do this to him.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin waves his hands in front of Nines. "Nines.exe has stopped working again."</p><p> </p><p>Nines takes a deep artificial breath. And with Gavin, at times, words fail him. "I am sorry, Gavin, I-I was just thinking."</p><p> </p><p>Gavin rolls his eyes, "Toaster, when aren't you?"</p><p> </p><p>'At times when I am with you', Nines almost says but holds back.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin's face grows serious. "Nines... I have been noticing that you are facing issues recently." He adds, uncharacteristically hesitant, "Why aren't you going to CyberLife to get them looked at?"</p><p> </p><p>Of course, Gavin has noticed, he is a detective, he also has deduced that Nines can't fix them by himself. And Gavin knows that Nines doesn't have good memories associated with CyberLife, he brought it up because he is genuinely concerned and conflicted. </p><p> </p><p>Gavin doesn't want to push Nines but if there is no other option, nothing really can be done. It touches Nines that Gavin is looking out for him. </p><p> </p><p>Nines smiles softly. "I will take care of it, Detective."</p><p> </p><p>Gavin looks like he wants to say something more but he nods, pats Nines' shoulder and walks away.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>Gavin feels someone poking in his mind, physically, probing, violating. He isn't alone in his mind? What the <em>fuck?</em> And that presence suddenly grows larger and closer and he realizes the brush, the familiarity, it is Nines!</p><p> </p><p>He feels angry, his privacy stolen, this is very sudden and why isn't Nines retreating? Why the fuck is he coming forward instead of going away? Nines knows how Gavin values his own thoughts, how much of a private person he is.</p><p> </p><p>A part of him tells him it is because Nines just wants to get Gavin out of his nightmare but another, more angry, frustrated, violated part just snaps at the other part to shut up. He uses his strength and ignores the part that is shouting at him about possible repercussions and pushes, kicks Nines' presence out forcefully without any hesitation.</p><p> </p><p>He wakes up with a start as he hears a heavy thud and breathes heavily. He tries to take in a lungful of air to calm down. That took more from him than he thought it would. Nines presence wasn't physical but it still had a huge impact.</p><p> </p><p>He opens his eyes and blinks and sees that Nines is on the floor instead of on the bed next to Gavin. A part of him feels sad that he did this to Nines but another part of him tells him that Nines deserves this, that he should be punched.</p><p> </p><p>"What the fuck? Tin can! That was uncalled for." He readies himself for a fight, he readies himself for an argument, he knows that Nines will fight back but it never comes. Nines looks so lost.</p><p> </p><p>Nines stutters, "G-Gavin, it w-was not on purpose."</p><p> </p><p>This is the first time Nines can connect with a human too. He should have seen this coming. All those incidents, Gavin had thought of Nines, their emotions had synced, Nines had thought of Gavin, they had been worried about each other or something along those lines.</p><p> </p><p>He has only interfaced with androids before. He doesn't like it, connecting with strange droids but he does it for work. The only one Nines does it willingly with, is of course, Connor. And even with Connor, they don't share everything with each other.</p><p> </p><p>"I thought this was only possible between androids?" Gavin hisses</p><p> </p><p>Nines closes his eyes. "G-Gavin, I didn't know either, I t-thought so too." It is a bit hard to bring himself under control. He hopes Gavin believes him. He doesn't want Gavin to think of him as a liar. He isn't. He isn't. This is very important. </p><p> </p><p>Sounds like a blatant lie though.</p><p> </p><p>Both of them kind of felt it - Nines more than Gavin - the weird incidents when they were around each other, they just brushed it off carelessly or on purpose, ignored it, if they had caught on and delved in deeper, this wouldn't have been so surprising. On hindsight, they could have actually predicted this.  </p><p> </p><p>And... Nines should have come out of Gavin's mind immediately, he should have tried to wake him up like usual, he shouldn't have forced in, barged in like that. A part of him couldn't stop of it but a part of him didn't try hard enough because he was too caught up in the moment and thought that this was a better way to help Gavin with his nightmares. </p><p> </p><p>He probably came off as intrusive, aggressive even, too eager, too curious to confirm. He got too excited because he finally found the answer to the anomaly that has been haunting him for weeks. He should have put Gavin first. Stupid. <em>Stupid.</em> Nines is supposed to be the best AI out there, with the best decision making skills but it crumbles when it comes to his human.</p><p> </p><p>Nines can still see a few images from Gavin's past as an after effect, Gavin being hit by his father - Gavin never told Nines about his family - and before Nines can try to shut it down, he feels a mental wall and it hurts as if he is rejected. It is not as if. He is rejected. Gavin doesn't want him in his mind. It hurts. It pains. A lot. Nines isn't enough for Gavin, never worthy enough. Might never be.</p><p> </p><p>Nines can't control these sudden surge of emotions. A few of those probably belong to Gavin too. It is a bit hard to separate the blurring lines to be honest. And he looks at Gavin and Nines can tell that Gavin is feeling the same way. Confused. Torn.</p><p> </p><p>And all of a sudden, Nines can't comprehend this. Why is this even happening? It was gradual but what the hell is this? Where is this supposed to lead them? Will this push them apart or bring them closer? What are the limits? What was the trigger?</p><p> </p><p>Gavin finally understands that Nines is feeling this for the first time too. It never occurred to him. He feels a bit guilty for having been so violent. </p><p> </p><p>Gavin is brought out of his thoughts as Nines asks in a raw voice, "You are not comfortable in sharing things with me, Detective?" Nines uses his title and not his name. Gavin knows that Nines is hurt but he doesn't want to sugar coat things or lie to Nines. That wouldn't be fair to either of them.</p><p> </p><p>Even though Nines has come a long way with his deviancy, there are still things he can't understand about emotions and social cues and human things like that.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin places a hand on his forehead, "Nines... this is an invasion of privacy, damn it, you can't do this until I am ready and for few things, I might never be."</p><p> </p><p>Nines sounds so lost. "Why?" Nines doesn't understand. Why does he suddenly want to know everything about Gavin? It is probably too much to process. That's why he is thrown off. He has always respected Gavin's boundaries but now, the lines are blurred and thin. It will take sometime for them to adjust.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin sighs, "Even lovers can't share everything with each other, Nines; there are boundaries that should be respected, that doesn't mean that they don't love each other. Not everything is meant to be shared, don't you have things that you don't want to share with me?"</p><p> </p><p>For sanity's sake. Somethings, dark, disturbing things are better not to be shared... unless both partners are mentally ready to accept each other and open up. Else... it might just end up driving a wedge between them. Certain uncomfortable topics have to broached carefully with prior suitable conversations.</p><p> </p><p>Nines says honestly, "I-I don't know, Gavin." He looks so down. So unsure. Gavin has never seen Nines like this. Nines wouldn't mind sharing things, all things with Gavin if Gavin were to ask but there are some things he would rather not want Gavin to know and he can only confirm that if it were to actually happen.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Oh...</em>
</p><p> </p><p>"Don't know what?" Gavin asks to make things clear. Nines doesn't say anything. Gavin softly prods, "Nines..."</p><p> </p><p>Nines sighs, "I don't know if I have something like that; I have so many memories since I was forced to wake up as a deviant and even from before then, since I was built, I don't know if I want to share all of them with you or only a few of them with you. I-I can't make a decision. I-I don't know what is right or wrong. Don't know if y-you would want to know or not or h-how you would react, d-don't know if I want you to know or not..." He trails off.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin's anger dissipates at Nines' desperate look, he looks like a baby, so vulnerable, so soft, so new, so young and Gavin realizes that despite looking like an adult Nines has been awake only for a few years and he is yet to learn a lot about his emotions, about deviancy in general. Sometimes Nines fools everyone around him and himself with how capable and mature he usually looks and is.</p><p> </p><p>Even Nines has something like this. This is brand new. And confusing as fucking hell.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin hates himself but he doesn't dwell on it too much because it was a human reaction and Gavin is like that, irrational and extremely emotional when it comes to things like these. </p><p> </p><p>"I am so sorry, Nines." He gently entwines their fingers together and Nines' fingers stop trembling. He is glad Nines doesn't push him away like Gavin did initially. Nines tries to be mature even in times like these. He watches as Nines' skin retracts.</p><p> </p><p>"Gavin, I am sorry too." Nines voice doesn't sound so broken anymore.</p><p> </p><p>"We will figure it out slowly, Nines."</p><p> </p><p>Nines nods and places his head on Gavin's shoulder. They stay in comfortable silence. It will take a long time indeed given how both of them can be stubborn and emotionally stunted at times. But they will get through it, together.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Please DO NOT REPOST my fics without my permission. Kindly ask me before hand for translations. Credit my work/profile Ao3/Wattpad URL without fail. I am on AO3 (<a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Wattpad (<a href="https://www.wattpad.com/user/alienfriendashkun">alien/imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Youtube (<a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEWO5kWpuGFJzdSV0LTLGKg?view_as=subscriber">Ash Kun</a>) and Tumblr(<a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and not on any other platform</p><p>Please help me report them if you find my fics somewhere else</p><p>Thank you for reading :D Have a nice day! Kindly leave a comment if you have time :)</p><p>Stay safe and take care! Be happy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>DISCLAIMER: All rights reserved. No part of these pages, either text or image may be used for any purpose other than personal use. Reproduction, modification, storage in a retrieval system or retransmission, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical or otherwise, for reasons other than personal use, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission. </p><p>All mistakes - plot, grammar, characterization, situation descriptions - are mine. Not beta'd. Let me know if there are glaring problems, I want to improve :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>/* BONUS */</p><p> </p><p>They figure things out slowly. It takes lot of time and patience. It is not just when they are running high on emotions that they can sense each other - positive or negative. It was like that at first but now, they can ease into each other's mind anytime, just in the blink of an eye. Without any trigger. </p><p> </p><p>And it is not just emotions and dreams and random thoughts, they can have entire conversations in their head, of course only if both are willing and in the mood for it, only if both of them are consenting. </p><p> </p><p>They can see each other's memories. Memories from a very long time back. Childhood memories that even Gavin can't remember - which human can? - but the memories are there in his subconsciousness, tucked away and Nines can view them and bring them to the front, he does so only with the happy ones, with Gavin's permission of course.</p><p> </p><p>They can tell whether the memory or the dream or the emotion is good or bad. They are categorized into messy colors in Gavin's case and in organized labels, in Nines' case. It is like watching a movie or some kind of hypnosis therapy session to be honest. It is like choosing a movie.</p><p> </p><p>Proximity doesn't even come into picture. It doesn't matter whether their palms are touching or not, it doesn't matter if they are in the same room or not. It doesn't matter if they are near or far away from each other.</p><p> </p><p>Apparently, such soulmate connections are not possible among multiple android only or multiple human only soul groups. It has been speculated for sometime that such things are possible between humans and androids too but no one has come forth. It seems the both of them are the first case and they haven't told anyone about this. Maybe there are others who haven't told either, not wanting their privacy to be invaded, not wanting to be interviewed or experimented upon.</p><p> </p><p>It is hit and miss but they get through it together. Sometimes, it happens just like that and ends up in a fighting match. Sometimes, it starts good and ends up with one of them having a panic attack or one of them pushing the other out and shutting down because of anger or sadness. They help each other in the end to get out of it. Sometimes, it starts bad and ends up good. It is always a mix of various things. They are not alone, they have each other, thankfully to test waters.</p><p> </p><p>Initially, they didn't click much, it wasn't convenient, it was dangerous even, as they had no control over it; after that first night it happened, major trouble followed for few weeks after. It happened at the most inopportune moments. At work. While crossing roads. During a criminal chase. During investigations. </p><p> </p><p>They couldn't just ignore it, they didn't have a choice, it kept hounding them but they slowly let themselves ease into it. It was confusing, turbulent, uneven but it works now somehow. They fit each other. They learned how to. Puzzle pieces. </p><p> </p><p>Of course, they still don't know everything about each other but they have better control, they know their triggers and they know each others' emotions and limits and act accordingly. They know how to ease out of it gently instead of violently kicking each other out. They know how to nudge the other out gently, to guide the other out gently instead of it coming off as being thrown from a 50 storied building to hit a pavement with a sick splat. Of course, sometimes when emotions are high, it is not gentle.</p><p> </p><p>But at least, they know how to stop it instead of making it feel like they are hurling themselves against brick walls at high speed. </p><p> </p><p>They know how to minimize the damage now.</p><p> </p><p>The initial doubts and hatred and uncertainties and the guilt and the blaming slowly recede. They don't mess up as they used to. It somehow works.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>The first time Gavin tries to walk into Nines' mind is a huge disaster.</p><p> </p><p>Nines almost shuts both Gavin and himself down.</p><p> </p><p>"Nin--es! Ni-nes, stay- with me! Take a deep b--reath." </p><p> </p><p>Nines struggles to hear Gavin's voice. It sounds broken but Nines knows that it is not Gavin who is having trouble speaking, it is him who has trouble listening. His audio receptors are failing because of his stress levels. His thirium pump is heating up. He can see multiple error and warning messages on his screen. His motors are whirring in overdrive. He clutches his chest. </p><p> </p><p>His mind has identified Gavin as a threat. It is usually never this bad. But it is probably because Gavin is a human. And Nines has only done this with androids. Gavin is very different. A human's mind is vastly different.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin is out of Nines' mind in an instant, like a light, he was in there just for a minute, he had trouble getting out of Nines' mind but he somehow did, he would have gotten out sooner if Nines' hadn't panicked. </p><p> </p><p>He felt Nines' struggles to <em>not</em> hurt Gavin. Gavin ignores the thought that a part of Nines' mind could have crushed him, part of Nines' mind wanted to confine him, close him in but Gavin got out. Nines didn't want to do it consciously. It was a reflex to protect himself, flight or fight reaction of sorts. </p><p> </p><p>Nines wanted to try. Usually, when they brushed minds before, it was only for a few seconds, be it feelings or random thoughts or worries. Maybe few mins max. Nines was in Gavin's mind the first time during nightmare for quite sometime before Gavin threw him out. That was the first time when it happened for more than a few seconds.</p><p> </p><p>After that, they practiced control and experimented. Gavin's mind slowly grew more familiar and accustomed to Nines' presence in his mind. They didn't actually start sharing things immediately - memories or conversations or words. Nines just stayed, that's all, a mental essence in additional to his physical presence. Just to get them used to it. They didn't try much.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin didn't say anything but Nines wanted to try having Gavin in his mind for sometime. Curious as always, eager to take things forward, that's Nines. He proposed it and Gavin accepted it reluctantly. He had an inkling that the first time wouldn't go well because he remembers how Nines is when he interfaces with random androids during investigations. It isn't a good sight. </p><p> </p><p>Nines' first time interfacing with Connor wasn't so smooth either. Of course, Connor and Gavin aren't strangers to Nines, especially the latter. They are more than partners and colleagues. </p><p> </p><p>It is because of Nines' build. He is not built for social niceties. However, Nines tries his hardest to make it work with Connor, to make it work for android victims' sake. He doesn't care about the perps - usually the damage is to the other person when Nines doesn't care and most of the people at the precinct look away when damage is done to disgusting perps who enjoy hurting or killing others without reason - they can go to hell but Nines' tries his best to make it easy for Connor and other android victims and relevant families. </p><p> </p><p>Gavin wasn't worried about himself. He was worried about Nines'. Nines cares too much about Gavin and he was right. Nines is the one who is hurt. Nines' mind identified Gavin as an intruder and tried to hurt him but Nines held back and now he is <em>fucking</em> hurting. Gavin knew this wasn't a good idea but a part of him knows that this is probably the first few times' hurdle they have to cross. Because when they brushed each other randomly, Nines wasn't hurt.</p><p> </p><p>When it happened randomly, they weren't acutely aware of it, their minds weren't focusing on it, unlike right now. And Gavin was mostly on the receiving end. This time it is Nines who is the one letting Gavin in.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin knows how Nines enjoys interfacing with Connor nowadays, they don't have to share things, just being silent in each other's mind helps both of them, especially Nines. Gavin notices how Nines' smiles after he helps another android - victim or family - despite the slight pain Nines himself felt for a few brief moments.</p><p> </p><p>He did hope that this wouldn't happen, he thought the probability would be a little less given that they it happened randomly before but guess he thought wrong. Those were not deliberate, Gavin's presence inside Nines' mind wasn't big.</p><p> </p><p>"Nines, Nines, concentrate on my heart beat, calm down, please."</p><p> </p><p>Nines completely freezes and Gavin freaks out even more - should he contact Connor, but he doesn't want Connor to be hurt because Nines would blame himself and Hank would kill him; should he get away from Nines; should he contact CyberLife - and a trembling hand is placed on top of Gavin's forearm.</p><p> </p><p>"I-I... f-i..."</p><p> </p><p>Nines tries to calm himself even more, Gavin needs him, he can't shut down now, he ignores the red blaring warnings and errors. He can't let Gavin blame himself. He can't go into statis in this kind of situation, leaving Gavin unsure and uncertain.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin sighs, why is Nines worrying about Gavin even in this state? Stupid android. Gavin isn't hurt. Actually, he is a little bit if he is is being honest, he expected himself to receive a special treatment but that aside, his ego isn't hurt that much. Nines is more important, not him.</p><p> </p><p>He knows that it is not Nines' fault, it is Nines' system that acted up, not Nines, Nines can't have absolute 100% control over his systems every time, Gavin himself has lost control and snapped at Nines at times, when he was drunk or sleepless or stressed out. Sometimes, bodies just take over for the sake of letting out, for the sake of preservation, instinct, gut reaction.</p><p> </p><p>Nines' system is just confused, it is the first time a weird human presence is inside him. Nines isn't ready yet, Nines wants this but his system just needs some time to understand and adapt. Nines' system is just trying to protect him because sometimes Nines doesn't care about himself when it comes to Gavin.</p><p> </p><p>"Shhh... it's OK, don't try to speak, it is OK, I am here, you are safe, you are not hurt, I am not hurt, it is OK, it is not your fault, OK? Don't try too hard. Don't push yourself. Just let it happen, think about your well being, not mine... shhh... let it pass. Just concentrate on getting better for me, can you do that, tin-... Nines?"</p><p> </p><p>Nines nods and his LED finally... finally moves to yellow. It was stuck in red for almost five minutes, fuck and with it Nines' stress levels go down slowly - painfully slowly, excruciatingly slowly - and so does Gavin's.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin hesitates and places his hand on Nines' forehead, when Nines doesn't react adversely, he places their foreheads together and whispers softly - he didn't even know he was capable of such gentle behavior, only Nines, only for Nines - "Good boy."</p><p> </p><p>Nines completely stills, goes slack and he relaxes in Gavin's hold as Gavin shifts to make them both comfortable.</p><p> </p><p>"Nines - look at me, it is OK, don't fight it, go into statis, you need this rest, don't force yourself to feel these negative emotions, OK? I am OK."</p><p> </p><p>Nines' blue eyes meet Gavin and Gavin knows that if he could have, Nines would have had tears in his eyes. There are no tears but his eyes look very forlorn. Gavin takes a deep breath and kisses Nines' nose softly. "It is OK, tin can."</p><p> </p><p>Since when did tin can become something more than sarcasm or teasing? Since when did it become a form of endearment between them?</p><p> </p><p>Nines isn't in a position to walk to their bed, Gavin can't lift Nines' weight, can't support it either but comfort be damned, he isn't leaving Nines all alone in statis against the cold wall. Gavin shifts once again so that Nines' head is on his lap, he doesn't even move to get a pillow for his aching back. He watches as Nines falls into statis, finally, fucking finally and gently cards his fingers through Nines' hair and feels himself drifting off as well.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Please DO NOT REPOST my fics without my permission. Kindly ask me before hand for translations. Credit my work/profile Ao3/Wattpad URL without fail. I am on AO3 (<a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Wattpad (<a href="https://www.wattpad.com/user/alienfriendashkun">alien/imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Youtube (<a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEWO5kWpuGFJzdSV0LTLGKg?view_as=subscriber">Ash Kun</a>) and Tumblr(<a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and not on any other platform</p><p>Please help me report them if you find my fics somewhere else</p><p>Thank you for reading :D Have a nice day! Kindly leave a comment if you have time :)</p><p>Stay safe and take care! Be happy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>DISCLAIMER: All rights reserved. No part of these pages, either text or image may be used for any purpose other than personal use. Reproduction, modification, storage in a retrieval system or retransmission, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical or otherwise, for reasons other than personal use, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission. </p><p>All mistakes - plot, grammar, characterization, situation descriptions - are mine. Not beta'd. Let me know if there are glaring problems, I want to improve :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>Surprisingly, Nines is the one who avoids the incident, shying away, thinking that he has overstepped something, thinking that he has failed Gavin and their relationship and Gavin is the one who forces Nines to talk about it. To face it. Usually both of them are pretty stubborn and straight forward but this time, it isn't easy for either of them.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin, one who runs away from things like these, who hates dealing with people and emotions, is the one who initiates the conversation for both of their sanity's sake and also because he hates seeing Nines wither into himself, doubt himself, doubt their relationship and everything. They assure each other.</p><p> </p><p>They try again, after weeks, after Nines is confident enough, after Nines does some AI mumbo jumbo shit that Gavin can't even comprehend and this time isn't smooth either but it is far, <em>far</em> better than their previous attempt. Not as turbulent. Not as rocky.</p><p> </p><p>And Nines is amazed. He is extremely happy that his hard work has been rewarded. And Gavin has to wade through some pink shitty mist and ignores his embarrassment at Nines' blatant adoration of Gavin. Nines is extremely happy to have Gavin in his mind. They don't talk or think or share or move, they just stay like that, very content and at peace.</p><p> </p><p>If Gavin feels guilty about how he kicked out Nines the first time out of his mind, he suppresses it. He can't change that now. He wishes he had reacted differently but that was a fucking expected Gavin reaction. All that matters now is that Nines is happy. Past cannot be changed. They can only learn from it.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>The structure of their mind is very different every time they connect. Sometimes, Gavin's mind is a mess of colors or tastes or music. Depends on his mood.</p><p> </p><p>Lighter shades of colors, light genre of music, gentle touch, good healthy taste if he is in a good mood, if he is well rested, not stressed, feeling happy.</p><p> </p><p>Darker shades of colors, mostly black, darker genre of music, screaming death metal, harsh touch and a pungent, bitter taste if he is in a bad mood. When he has nightmares. When some perp gets on his nerves. When he avoids food and rest for the sake of a case even though Nines tries his best to not let Gavin reach this state.</p><p> </p><p>Nines isn't scared of this raw side of Gavin, not at all. It is more personal now that he can actually feel all this but it doesn't change things much between them. He just doesn't want Gavin to feel like this, no matter what the situation.</p><p> </p><p>Somewhere in between if he is concentrating on work or something productive, alternating smoothly.</p><p> </p><p>Nines' mind is much more structured. It isn't colorful or tasteful or loud. It is more like labels and cabinets and strings, arranged by dates or words or emotions, like a catalogue. </p><p> </p><p>Gavin once even compared it to tinder swipe through. Gavin literally can swipe and choose memories or dreams to view. </p><p> </p><p>It is like a mini movie screen with lots of details in texts and options and filters. It is beautiful and just like Nines.</p><p> </p><p>Good memories have larger boxes and thicker string dimensions and detailed descriptions and labels. They are at the front. Bad memories or emotions have small boxes and are shoved at the back in the dark, harder passwords to crack, locked more tightly, thin dimensions of wires hard to catch, trying to coil away and clipped, untidy descriptions - as untidy as a computer font can be.</p><p> </p><p>Frequently accessed memories - mostly Gavin's - are in the front too. And they don't feel cold despite the entire cabinet like structure being painted in the colors of teal blue and gray. They don't feel impersonal, they don't feel like serious documents. And the threads surrounding these boxes don't shy away from Gavin's touch. They open easy too, without much resistance.</p><p> </p><p>No matter what, Gavin can decipher them all. Get to them all. Tough or not. Close enough or far away.</p><p> </p><p>Much like Nines' synthskin that recedes during times of affection with Gavin, his mind is also quite similar. It lights up when Gavin explores and finds something good and reacts. Dulls a little bit when Gavin finds something bad.</p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>They explore more, they are very comfortable with each other now. Each experience is different, beautiful, unique, literally. </p><p> </p><p>They were outed at the office - thankfully after many months - when Nines' voice and facts slipped naturally out of Gavin's mouth. They were still exploring new things every day and weren't trying to actively hide it anymore. Few other cases of human-android connections had already popped up around the city and no one was surprised at the precinct, it was as if they had expected it to happen sooner. Some thought it already happened too. Anti climatic, to be honest. Dramatic and very silly.</p><p> </p><p>Nines has never felt like this with Connor or any of the other androids. Nines can't interface with any other human though, he tried with Tina and Chris - with their <em>permission</em> of course, consent is very important! - but none of them felt anything.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin didn't feel a possessive happiness at that, he didn't.</p><p> </p><p>Nines has projected files, images, videos onto walls and screens during work multiple times but when Gavin sees the world through Nines' eyes, it is different; it is much more, he can see the text, the analysis, the stats, the screen, the messages, the data, the processing, the power... Gavin loves the feel. It isn't scary or overwhelming, it just feels very efficient as he lets it all wash over him.</p><p> </p><p>It never gets boring even though they have done it multiple times. It never stops fascinating him.</p><p> </p><p>"Tin can, your world is beautiful." And Gavin also knows that there is a mind palace, a garden just for Gavin, a different AI version of Gavin living inside Nines, a figment of imagination and honestly, if that isn't fucking love and devotion, what else is?</p><p> </p><p>It slips before Gavin can stop himself. It is not like he has not told it before, it is always punched out of him. He sounds like a fucking high school kid with a crush but damn it, who cares?</p><p> </p><p>Nines chuckles. He gently places his fingers on Gavin's cheeks.</p><p> </p><p>"Gavin, your world is even more beautiful than mine, more human, mine is just artificial, yours isn't, it is nice to see the world without warnings and errors and texts through your eyes. You don't know how much it means to me."</p><p> </p><p>Nines actually had tears in his eyes the first time he saw through Gavin's eyes. Another discovery. Deviancy can make androids cry. His tears were blue but yes, it happened.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin kisses Nines' fingers as something clenches inside his chest. Nines deserves this and the whole world. If that is what Nines wants, that is what Gavin will give him, that is what he will get for sure without even having to ask or hesitate or fight for it - Nines always puts Gavin first - and Gavin doesn't like Nines putting his own world down. That's a big NO.</p><p> </p><p>Gavin rolls his eyes, "Tin can, artificial or not... it is just as beautiful, interesting, fascinating and nothing you say will convince me otherwise."</p><p> </p><p>Nines pulls him for a soft kiss which Gavin puts more force into.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Please DO NOT REPOST my fics without my permission. Kindly ask me before hand for translations. Credit my work/profile Ao3/Wattpad URL without fail. I am on AO3 (<a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Wattpad (<a href="https://www.wattpad.com/user/alienfriendashkun">alien/imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Youtube (<a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEWO5kWpuGFJzdSV0LTLGKg?view_as=subscriber">Ash Kun</a>) and Tumblr(<a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and not on any other platform</p><p>Please help me report them if you find my fics somewhere else</p><p>Thank you for reading :D Have a nice day! Kindly leave a comment if you have time :)</p><p>Stay safe and take care! Be happy.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please DO NOT REPOST my fics without my permission. Kindly ask me before hand for translations. Credit my work/profile Ao3/Wattpad URL without fail. I am on AO3 (<a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Wattpad (<a href="https://www.wattpad.com/user/alienfriendashkun">alien/imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and Youtube (<a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEWO5kWpuGFJzdSV0LTLGKg?view_as=subscriber">Ash Kun</a>) and Tumblr(<a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imaginaryfriendashkun">imaginaryfriendashkun</a>) and not on any other platform</p><p>Please help me report them if you find my fics somewhere else</p><p>Thank you for reading :D Have a nice day! Kindly leave a comment if you have time :)</p><p>Stay safe and take care! Be happy.</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>